I received a free copy of Love Idol by Jennifer Dukes Lee as a part of her Book Launch Team.
When I first met Jennifer last spring or summer and she told me about Love Idol over lunch, and that it was about our need for approval, I said "I think I need to read that book". There are a few statements that caught my attention early in the book:
"But no matter how much we get--or how good we are--there's someone always doing life better, writing her story more poetically, speaking her words more eloquently, living her days more gracefully, raising her children, being promoted more regularly (And she probably has better hair)." (xx) We always compare ourselves to others, we feel as if we need to constantly be or do more and more in order to find our worth. Jennifer teaches us that seeking this approval and acceptance as we do can make us become controlled by it: it becomes our Love Idol.
I also appreciated that she wrote that she couldn't "pinpoint a trigger in [her] personal history to explain why [she has] sought human approval over these years" (5). Even though her parents believed in hard work, they never made her feel as if she had to earn her love an approval. Many people today will tell stories of trying hard to earn love, and, like Jennifer, I never felt that way. Yet, like Jennifer, something in me craves approval.
Throughout the book, Jennifer weaves in stories from her life as a reporter, interviewing Al Gore and covering the death of Timothy McVeigh, as well as ways that her daughter is facing similar approval issues in her young life, using examples from 4H events and spelling bees. She hopes to be able to break the hold that approval has on both of them, as well as any of us reading the book. She writes of being able to try and fail instead of needing to be perfect.
Her main point is that God already loves us, and we do not need to prove our worth to him or find our worth in others. I would recommend anyone who may be struggling with finding one's worth read this book--and assure yourself that you are preapproved.